Planning an accessible wedding can add another layer of stress and limitations, when you’ve already got a lot going on.
Whether it’s you, your partner, or a wedding guest, chances are that someone at your wedding will have a disability that should be accommodated for. Depending on the nature of the disability, it may mean that certain venues just won’t work out. Plus, there will be other factors to consider such as transportation, table layouts, and traditions, even after you find a venue that may work for you.
Top Tips For An Accessible Wedding
Luckily, there are more and more resources available to those planning an accessible wedding, each day. This post is hopefully one of them. Based on an interview I had with Alexis, the lovely friend I made when she designed this website*, I’ve compiled tips for planning an accessible wedding.
*By the way, if you love the look of this site, you can reach out to Alexis via Laugh Eat Learn.
Hopefully the tips in this post will help you recognize which ones may apply to your wedding, and you’re able to start using them early on.
Let’s get into it!
MEET ALEXIS AND JONATHAN
Before we get into the tips, I’d like you to meet the source of them!
As mentioned above, Alexis has been a great contributor for this post. She married her fiancé, Jonathan, in 2018. The two met in 2011, on Eharmony, and just clicked. Both being quite techy, they were even able to share emails with each other, even though it wasn’t allowed.
A month after exchanging emails, they went on their first date. Apparently, Alexis was five minutes late due to traffic, but Jonathan likes to share that she was late. Period. No mention of how late she was. Once they met, they hit it off and have been together ever since. They celebrated 10 years in February, and just hit their third wedding anniversary on October 18th.
Once they were engaged, Alexis knew that they would have to have an accessible wedding, as Jonathan drives a wheelchair. This meant that things like floor plan, facilities, and even clothing would have to have an extra layer of thought behind them. Inspired by the lack of information out there to help in 2018, Alexis has offered her advice to help others who are in the same situation.
Big thanks to Alexis for contributing to this post! Keep reading for her top tips.
1. HAVE A LIST OF QUESTIONS BEFORE YOU CALL VENUES
Whether you are planning an accessible wedding, or a wedding that just has some unique requests, you should have a list of your questions available before you call venues.
To prepare for this, work with your partner to make the list. Go over items like parking, entering the venue, photography locations, space, table layouts, and anything else that may be relevant to your vision and limitations. It may help to look at photos of each potential venue before you call. These photos can help identify issues or deal breakers. While on the call, the venue can work through your list of questions with you, to see if they can be mitigated.
2. FOCUS ON THE VENUE’S FLOOR PLAN
If you, your partner, or a guest has a disability, floor plan is likely to be a big factor when you choose a venue.
Floor plans are particularly tricky for accessibility. Wheelchairs, canes, or even just being prone to falling can all be impacted with steps or small doorways. If you’re getting married, or are very close to the wedding, it’s important that you have access through the same entrances as everyone else. Imagine that your wheelchair won’t fit through a small doorway. Having to go through a side entrance, or the back of a building, just to attend your wedding, isn’t ideal.
When you look for a venue, watch out for accessibility impediments. This goes for anywhere you, or your guests, need to access, including doorways and bathrooms. The ideal wedding venue will have large, spacious entrances and rooms, with lots of space to move around and create accessible options.
If you’re in the Seattle area, this is the venue that Alexis and Jonathan chose. It was completely ground level and very large. They also loved that they were allowed to bring their own food and drinks, while the venue provided tables and chairs.
3. FIND A VENUE WITH ACCESSIBLE FACILITIES
Alexis and Jonathan chose their venue for many reasons, but two big ones were the bathroom and “getting ready” spaces.
As mentioned above, bathrooms are important for accessibility. Having large stalls, or completely private bathrooms, are ideal. As for getting ready locations, most wedding venues will offer a space for the couple to be before ceremony. Many couples also use this space to get ready for the wedding.
If these spaces are not easy to get to, the venue itself may not work for you. The venue that Alexis and Jonathan chose was great for them because Jonathan and his groomsmen were able to stay downstairs before the wedding, while Alexis and her girls were in a private space upstairs.
4. PUT SOME THOUGHT INTO TABLE LAYOUTS
Once you find a venue that seems to provide adequate accessibility, take some time to vision how your tables will be laid out.
Depending on your reception venue, there may be limits to table layouts. For those in wheelchairs, or who have difficulty getting around, there needs to be enough space to move around. Lots of small tables crammed together is likely to create a lot of obstacles, so ask your venue about options.
When Alexis and Jonathan got married, they opted to have two long farmhouse style tables, rather than round ones. This setup made it very easy to ensure that Jonathan could drive around and visit guests.
5. CHOOSE A VENUE WITH A COORDINATOR WHO “GETS IT”
An important part of finding a venue that can provide an accessible wedding is the ability to work with understanding people there.
Almost every wedding venue will have a coordinator who you’ll work with. When you first call them be sure to discuss your concerns about accessibility. Pay attention to how they respond. Do they mention experience with other weddings that have accommodated disabilities? Can they think of innovative ideas that will help make your experience 100% accessible? Are they continuing the conversation of accessibility, or do you have to keep bringing it up?
Alexis stresses that it’s important to have a venue coordinator who truly understands what accessibility means. It’s not just about entering a venue and having dinner. It’s about being able to use all facilities and visit all places that every other guest has access to.
6. USE WELL KNOWN WEDDING WEBSITES TO FIND VENDORS WITH ACCESSIBLE WEDDING EXPERIENCE
As I mentioned above, it may be difficult to find resources when it comes to planning an accessible wedding.
Alexis shared with me that when she was planning her wedding, she found just one blog post with photos of a wedding where the groom was in a wheelchair. Though this blog post helped them decide what Jonathan was going to wear, it didn’t help in terms of finding vendors or actual wedding planning.
One website that did have some resources was Wedding Wire. Alexis says that it helped with overall wedding planning and finding vendors, including her day of coordinator. This was important because their DOC helped make decisions, find solutions, and ensured their wedding went to plan. Alexis also recommends hiring vendors early for an accessible wedding so you can minimize the time spent figuring things out.
7. MODIFY CLOTHING AS NEEDED
Clothing choices may depend on the nature of your, or your guest’s disability, but it’s still something to consider if it’s applicable.
Because Jonathan drives a wheelchair, Alexis and Jonathan decided to make intentional clothing choices for their wedding day. In particular, they choose for Jonathan to wear a vest, and have properly tailored pants. The vest that he wore was shortened in the back so he wouldn’t be sitting on it or have it bunch up.
Of course, everyone looks into making sure that their clothes fit nicely on their wedding day. However, if your dimensions require a bit more tailoring than usual, it’s important to make sure you give yourself, and your tailor, a little extra time to work.
8. SKIP TRADITIONS THAT DON’T WORK FOR YOU
I’ve said this before in other blog posts, and I’ll say it again with regards to having an accessible wedding. It’s okay to modify or skip traditions that don’t suit you.
Certain wedding traditions require being able to bend, stand, or just have general mobility. For example, retrieving a garter belt for a garter toss can be difficult for someone in a wheelchair. And certain dances can also be hard for those who have trouble standing. While it’s okay to modify any traditions that are particularly important to you, it’s also okay to just omit them from your wedding if they don’t suit your needs or situation.
9. CONSIDER PARKING & ACCESSIBILITY
Even if you find a venue with an awesome and functional layout, and accessibility within the venue isn’t an issue, you’ll still need to look at how easy it is to park and actually get into the venue.
If guests have to park and then walk a long way, with rugged terrain, it could pose accessibility issues. Also, guests who are in wheelchairs often have specialty vehicles or vans that can be difficult to find parking for. When you’re looking for a venue, pay attention to how easy it is to park, and how close you can park to the entrance.
If either of these things are difficult, you may be able to coordinate a separate pickup or drop off with your venue. For example, my wedding venue had a long walk from the parking lot to our ceremony. Our venue offered to pick up elderly guests in a golf cart to help accommodate those who could not make the walk.
10. WATCH OUT FOR TRANSPORTATION OBSTACLES
Along the same lines as parking, transportation is a biggie when it comes to an accessible wedding.
For some disabilities, a regular Uber or taxi just won’t be able to accommodate. And, unfortunately, limos are rarely (if ever) accessible. So, if you want to arrive at your wedding, or leave, with a large group, you’ll have to look into other options. Alexis was able to work with her wedding planner to find a nice, white, accessible van to allow their group to be picked up from the venue after the wedding and be dropped off at their hotel, together.
11. PLAN AHEAD FOR PHOTOGRAPHY
No wedding is complete without photography.
If you’ve ever had professional photos taken, you’ll know that you’re often asked to climb up hillsides, stand in awkward locations, and crouch yourself into different positions. Unfortunately, these sorts of things may not work for everyone.
In order not to miss out on amazing photography, plan ahead with your photographer. Alexis found that it helped that they had the same photographer for their engagement photos, so they were prepared for the wedding day.
Before you meet your photographer, let them know about any accessibility limitations and what kind of photos you’d like to have. For example, if you’d like to take advantage of the changing seasons outside, but need to find accessible roads and sidewalks, tell your photographer in advance. They can help locate the right space. Be clear about what you cannot do. A skilled professional can help take care of the rest.
CLOSING THOUGHTS
Hopefully, as time goes on, and more and more awareness is available, the options for the perfect accessible wedding venue will be much more clear. Until then, find great vendors on well know sites, be clear about what your needs are, and vet out all potential issues before you book your venue. Happy wedding planning!
More From Hummingbird Wedding Advice:
10 Tips For A Happy & Healthy Wedding
How To Create A Wedding Health & Beauty Plan
Three Ways To Be Centered & Relaxed On Your Wedding Day
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