16 Tips To Cope With Being The Center Of Attention On Your Wedding Day

Whether you’re into it or not, you will be the center of attention on your wedding day.

It kind of comes with the territory of being the couple getting married.

The thing is, though, is that not everyone wants to be the center of attention on their wedding day. Some people prefer to fade into the background. Just be another face in the crowd. They don’t want the limelight. This may be for a variety of reasons, and all of them are valid. If you don’t want to be the center of attention on your wedding day, you have the right to feel what you feel.

However, again, the focus will be on you and your fiancé on your wedding day. And, you may need some tips to cope with this fact. Of course, you can keep your wedding small. You can minimize your interaction with others, avoid saying your own wedding vows, and be extra super prepared going into your ceremony and reception. All of this will help, and there are more tips out there for you in this post.

16 Tips To Cope With Being The Center Of Attention On Your Wedding Day

This post is going to give you sixteen tips to cope with being the center of attention on your wedding day. It has tips to help minimize the attention you will actually get. There are also tips to help you actually feel more comfortable with the focus being on you. The tips are broad, and they will not work for every single person. If you really don’t want anyone looking at you, ever, you may want to rethink the whole wedding thing and keep it to just you and your partner. Just saying.

Let’s get into it!

1. KEEP YOUR PRE-WEDDING EVENTS MINIMAL AND EXCLUSIVE

One tip to cope with being the center of attention on your wedding day is to make it clear early on that you don’t want the attention.

This starts with your pre-wedding events. I’m talking about bridal showers, bachelor parties, or engagement parties. Maybe you skip them altogether. Or, if you do have these events, they are very minimal and very exclusive. Perhaps there are just a few close friends at them, and not a lot of fanfare. This should set the tone that you’re not into all the fawning and fanning that comes with being at your wedding.

2. HAVE AN ENGAGEMENT PHOTO SHOOT TO GET USED TO HAVING YOUR PIC TAKEN

While some introverted or shy people do actually enjoy having their photos taken, others don’t. And, to be honest, having your photo taken does make you the center of attention.

If you have qualms with this aspect of your wedding day, confront the situation ahead of your wedding. Having an engagement photo shoot can help you ease into the photo taking process. And, in most cases, it will help you get to know your photographer. It can also help them understand your preferences and style so they can make sure you enjoy your wedding even more.

3. HIRE A PHOTOGRAPHER WHO SPECIALIZES IN CANDIDS INSTEAD OF POSES

While we’re on the topic of photography, let’s talk about photography styles.

If you are not into the attention and focus on your wedding day, but are hiring a photographer to capture the day, think about hiring one who specializes in candid photos. This means that they will find the opportunities to take snapshots while you’re going about your business on your wedding day. There won’t be a lot of posed photos, where you are clearly the focus. Instead, the camera will be around you instead of on you, so to speak.

4. SPEND EXTRA EFFORT ON YOUR REHEARSAL TO COPE WITH BEING THE CENTER OF ATTENTION ON YOUR WEDDING DAY

For some people, the thought of having a ceremony on their wedding day can induce a lot of anxiety.

I mean, what if something goes wrong? All eyes will be on you and your partner. What if the plan isn’t followed? Or someone messes up something? Of course, a lot of feelings can come up. It seems normal.

To mitigate this, to cope with being the center of attention on your wedding day, put extra effort into your rehearsal. Make sure all important people are present for it. Go over things more than once. Take time to answer questions, and pay attention to the answers that are given. All of this will help with a smooth ceremony.

5. KEEP THINGS PEACEFUL RIGHT BEFORE YOUR WEDDING

No one wants to enter their wedding already riled up. This is why finding peace ahead of the wedding is important.

To do this, all you need is a little space. Just be somewhere alone. You can even go into a bathroom. And then breath. You can breathe in and out, slowly, for a minute (or more), to feel the effects. You may also want to close your eyes, and sit while doing this. If someone is irking you, find some space from them. If you have nerves, be prepared with a mantra to calm them. 

6. GO FOR THE FIRST LOOK TO COPE WITH BEING THE CENTER OF ATTENTION ON YOUR WEDDING DAY

Are you thinking of doing a first look? If you want help with being the center of attention on your wedding day, you should go for it.

The great thing about a first look, or when the couple sees each other before the wedding, is that it tends to be private. It’s usually just the couple and their photographer. A first look is sweet, yes, but it also helps with the nerves. I don’t know exactly why, but it does. It made me much more calm at my ceremony, at least.

7. AVOID SPEAKING AT YOUR CEREMONY (EXCEPT FOR MAYBE REPEAT AFTER ME)

One issue that many people have about being the center of attention at their wedding is the whole public speaking thing.

So, skip it.

There is no rule that says you have to speak at your wedding. Maybe your partner can do a sort of thank you for everyone. Or someone else can say thanks. And when it comes to your wedding ceremony, you can totally rely on your officiant. Make them speak, and you can either repeat after them, or stay silent (except for the whole “I do” thing).

8. HAVE TWO ESCORTS DOWN THE AISLE (OR ENTER WITH YOUR PARTNER)

Maybe part of your concerns about everyone looking at you at your wedding has to do with entering your ceremony. If this is the case, recruit some back up.

It may help your nerves if you are in the middle of two trusted people. It’s almost like they act as a buffer as you enter the ceremony space. Or, alternatively, enter with your partner. This will allow the two of you to be the focus, rather than just you.

9. HAVE “QUIET” SPACES NEAR YOUR RECEPTION TO COPE WITH BEING THE CENTER OF ATTENTION ON YOUR WEDDING DAY

Sometimes the stimulation is what gives us concern. If you think you may get overstimulated at your wedding, find ways to escape it.

What does this look like? Well, you can ask your venue about quiet spaces around your reception that you can pop into. Maybe it’s the bridal suite, or maybe it’s a bathroom. Perhaps there’s a side room or a lesser-known balcony. Sometimes just knowing you can “escape” helps.

10. JOIN YOUR WEDDING AT COCKTAIL HOUR INSTEAD OF A BIG ENTRANCE

Not everyone wants to run into their wedding reception, jumping with excitement while being announced. It’s totally fair to skip the big entrance if you’re not feeling it.

The main strategy to skip the big entrance is to just join your wedding guests after the ceremony. Or, take some photos and then join them. And then sit down with them, when the right time comes. Yes, you will get attention during the time between ceremony and reception, but it won’t be an “all eyes on you” kind of thing.

11. INVITE OTHERS TO DANCE WHEN YOU DANCE TO COPE WITH BEING THE CENTER OF ATTENTION ON YOUR WEDDING DAY

Not feeling the dancing in front of everyone part of weddings? Modify it.

To do this, you don’t have to skip dances like the first dance, and the parents’ dances, if you still want them. You just invite others to participate with you. It may be select guests, or it may be the entire group at your wedding. You get to decide what works best for you and go for it.

12. PRACTICE SMALL TALK TO COPE WITH BEING THE CENTER OF ATTENTION ON YOUR WEDDING DAY

I don’t love small talk. And, I’m guessing I’m not alone in that.

The issue with weddings is that there is small talk. And, it can get awkward. So, practice it. Practice thanking others. Practice telling others you are glad they came. Get yourself accustomed to saying things in response to other things. And, practice an out. I like a simple “it was so nice to see you, and I’m going to let you get back to the party”.  It’s all it takes to politely excuse yourself from a conversation. Try it next time you’re over the small talk.

13. AVOID THE SWEETHEART TABLE, MAYBE

Do you know the difference between a sweetheart table, and a head table? If not, check out this post.

There are some schools of thought that a sweetheart table is the wrong move if you want to cope with being the center of attention on your wedding day. I mean, you’re on display. Maybe a head table is the right move. However, a head table is still on display, just with more people.

Long story short, you can do what works for you. Stay sweetheart and sit with just your new spouse. Sit with your guests. Sit in the back. Do what you like, and it will be okay.

14. GET YOUR PARTNER (OR SOMEONE ELSE) TO DO THE THANK YOU SPEECH

As mentioned before, one way to cope with being the center of attention on your wedding day is to avoid being the one to speak during the thank you speech.

And yes, there should be some sort of thank you speech.

To be clear, there are no rules about who actually thanks guests for coming. Or thanks the bridal party, vendors, and families for participating. It can be anyone who has knowledge of the wedding. Ideally, probably one of the people getting married. But, it can be one of your parents, a member of your bridal party, or even your MC or officiant. The key here is that it isn’t you.

15. HAVE A CODE WORD WITH YOUR PARTNER TO COPE WITH BEING THE CENTER OF ATTENTION ON YOUR WEDDING DAY

Need some sort of safety net on your wedding day? Maybe have a code word with your partner.

Now, this code word can be used when you’re getting overwhelmed. Or tired. Perhaps it’s when you’re getting anxious. The point is that your partner can recognize the word, and knows what to do next. They may need to interject into a conversation. Or, pull you away so you can regroup. Chances are you won’t even use the word. Just having it there can be calming, though.

16. DON’T DO CAKE CUTTING, BOUQUET TOSSING, GARTER RETRIEVING . . .

Last tip! If you don’t want to be the center of attention on your wedding day, find ways to avoid it.

This means skipping traditions that put you front and center. For example, cake cutting, bouquet tossing, and garter retrieving. There are likely other American traditions out there, and you’re welcome to skip them, too. Your wedding will still be valid without them. Promise.

THOUGHTS ON HOW TO COPE WITH BEING THE CENTER OF ATTENTION ON YOUR WEDDING DAY

Friends, it’s okay if you aren’t sure how to cope with being the center of attention on your wedding day. It’s not for everyone. Follow the tips in this post, and you’re likely to have a better experience than if you don’t, though. The key is to be proactive. Know your limits. And set controls wherever possible. You’ve got this! Happy wedding planning. 

More On Wedding Day Health & Wellness From Hummingbird Wedding Advice

How To Find Motivation To Get Into Shape For Your Wedding

Dealing With Family Drama Around Your Wedding

10 Signs You’re Overwhelmed With Wedding Planning

Did you find this post helpful, inspiring? PIN it to your Wedding Day Of Advice Board on Pinterest!