Four Myths About Tipping Wedding Vendors

Tipping wedding vendors can be a controversial and confusing subject.

One of the reasons tipping wedding vendors is so confusing is because every source about it says something different. Some guides will lay out the exact percentages to give each business as a tip, and others may suggest an amount. The issue is that these guides all tend to differ from each other on their suggestions. It can be downright overwhelming to try and sort out.

There are clearly a lot of myths that come from all the information on tipping. The main guideline that I want you to take away from this post is that the practice of tipping wedding vendors is totally up to you. Yes, there are certain things you can take into consideration. However, there are no hard and fast rules on how much and who to tip. Everything depends on the profession you are tipping, your culture, and your experience with their service.

Let’s address some major myths when it comes to tipping wedding vendors. Keep in mind that though there are no rules on this subject, there are general guidelines that you can adhere to. It’s important to know what is out there as bad advice, and the actual truth behind it.

MYTH #1 – Every vendor needs a tip.

TRUTH – Tipping wedding vendors is not mandatory, unless stated in a signed contract.

No, you are not expected to tip every vendor at your wedding. However, this can make it even more confusing when you determine who to tip.

Why It’s So Tricky To Figure Out Who Gets A Tip

As you will see below, tipping is subjective and cultural. Plus, Tipping should also be reserved for vendors who go above and beyond what their normal services offer.

While some professions rely on tips, others do not. In some cultures, vendors may need tips to supplement lower wages. This is especially true for bartenders, wait staff, and servers. It is even expected in most of North America that tipping will be included in the overall bill. When you list out your wedding vendors, you may find that some of them clearly would expect a tip, while others are more of a gray area.

For example, compare the servers at your wedding to those who deliver rental equipment. The servers may rely on tips for their livelihood (at least in the USA and Canada), while the rental company does not. Plus, the rental company may already have a delivery fee included in their contract. A client would not be expected to tip on top of that amount.

Though vendors such as servers, caterers, DJ’s, and bands tend to receive tips, there is a notable catch with that. Almost all of the time, tipping will be mentioned in their contracts, with a specified amount to include above and beyond the bill.

You may be asking yourself if you need to tip your florist, coordinator, photographer, or officiant? The answer is, it depends. There is a guideline that you do not need to tip someone who owns the business you are hiring. However, this guideline may not sit well with you if you feel you had amazing service. If you feel compelled, you can always offer them a tip, or thank them in another way.

Here are some questions to ask if you want to decide who to tip:

Is the amount we are already paying them for the service enough?
Is there a required tip amount already specified in the contract?

Do they own the business you are hiring from?
Is there a more meaningful way we can thank them?
Do they depend on tips?
Are they expecting a tip?
If we tip them, should it be a percentage of the overall bill, or a set amount?

Based on the answers to these questions, it may become clear whether you should tip a specific vendor or just pay your bill at the end of the wedding.

MYTH #2 – All tips have to be the same amount.

TRUTH – Tip amounts can vary based on the service provided.

The amount that you tip a wedding vendor is completely subjective. It may depend on the type of service, or your own personal preference. You may really want to show your appreciation for an amazing service provided, and that is the main reason why you would provide a tip. Let’s get rid of the expectation that couples have to tip every wedding vendor the same amount.

Whether that amount is $100, or 15%, or varied, it is all subjective per vendor and service. In some cases, a percentage of the overall charge may be appropriate to tip. In others, a set amount would be appreciated. For example, a wedding band may cost thousands of dollars. A couple may decide to tip each band member a set amount rather than an overall percentage of the bill. Alternatively, they could decide that their bartender receives a tip that is percentage of the overall drink charges.

MYTH #3 – All tips should be paid at the wedding.

TRUTH – Tips can be paid when it makes sense most for you to pay them.

Keep in mind that when you pay tips to wedding vendors is totally up to you and your situation.

Because tipping wedding vendors should be based on the level of service they provide your wedding, if you want to wait until after the wedding to provide a tip, that is totally fine. Conversely, you could tip ahead of time in anticipation of great service. If you want, you can also tip at the actual wedding, but keep in mind that this may be more difficult to coordinate and logistically has some risks (more on that below).

Unless you have a contract with a vendor that specifies when a tip is supposed to be paid, you have a lot of flexibility here. For example, your caterer may include gratuity in their bill, and the bill may need to be paid at least two days before the wedding. In this case you’ll have to pay their tip when their contract states.

There are pro’s and con’s for tipping wedding vendors at various times around the wedding. Let’s go over each of them:

Tipping Wedding Vendors Before The Wedding

Tipping before the wedding is easy if the contract already specifies that you will include a tip.

Many wedding bills are taken care of in full right before the wedding, so if you have already paid, you’ve already paid. This is especially common when it comes to food, beverages, and transportation charges. Paying for a tip ahead of time is easy to take care of, and may also work as an incentive for a vendor to provide a great service.

Tipping Wedding Vendors During The Wedding

Tipping wedding vendors during the wedding is common, but does require some logistics.

Weddings are a crazy busy time for everyone involved. Guests are mingling, your family is dancing and having fun, you are on cloud nine, and wedding vendors are running around. So, if you are planning on tipping wedding vendors at the wedding, you need to have a game plan for it.

The easiest way to dole out tips at a wedding is to have a designated point person to take care of it. You will need to identify a responsible adult who can handle carrying cash or checks, and be able to find and approach various vendors by the end of the wedding. This person will have to hand them said cash or check (in an envelope), and make sure that everything is taken care of.

There are some risks associated with this plan, like the point person not following through correctly, the envelopes getting lost or stolen, or any other number of things that can get in the way of the plan. However, it can still be done.

Tipping Wedding Vendors After The Wedding

If you want to tip wedding vendors after the wedding, no one will mind.

Tipping after the wedding is so easy. It also helps you decide who to tip, and how much. You’ll be able to talk over your experience with your partner and family and find out which vendors really did go above and beyond. When you send a tip after the wedding, you can deliver it in person to the vendor, send electronically, or mail a check (depending on the vendor, location, and your comfort level).

MYTH #4 – Tipping is the only way to thank a vendor.

TRUTH – There are lots of ways to thank a vendor for their service.

Tipping wedding vendors is not the only way that you can thank them for their service and support.

Many businesses would appreciate a review or testimonial over receiving a little extra money. This is especially true for small businesses owned by photographers, DJ’s, officiants, and florists. Leaving a detailed and positive review online is always welcomed by these businesses. They also love video testimonials they may be able to share with other clients. Also, don’t forget shout outs on your social media.

When you consider the service that you received from each vendor, keep in mind that your “shout outs” and reach to other potential clients will be worth a lot more to these businesses than any tip could ever be, especially if it’s a rave review.

CLOSING THOUGHTS

Tipping wedding vendors can be a tricky and controversial wedding task to take care of. Hopefully this post cleared up some common myths surrounding it. The most important thing to remember is that every situation is different, there is no one size fits all, and you will have to do what’s right for your wedding, location, and vendors. It’s not about blindly doling out money to everyone at your wedding, it’s about providing a heartfelt thanks for an incredible service provided.

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