Ideas To Help You Include Your Mom In Your Wedding

Want to include your mom in your wedding but aren’t sure how? This is the post for you!

A few months ago, I wrote a post about how to include your dad in your wedding. In that post I go over how each dad is created differently. Some want to be super involved in their kid’s wedding, and others just don’t. Moms are the same. There’s sort of a papa bear, mama bear, baby bear spectrum going on with each situation. Some moms are overbearing, others are hands-off, and even more are “just right”.

No matter where your mom falls on the spectrum of involvement, chances are that you want to include your mom in your wedding. Maybe you need to give her a special focus so she doesn’t meddle in everything. Or, you just want to connect with her as you plan your wedding. Perhaps you want to involve her, but aren’t sure what your options are. In any case, this post has you covered.

Ideas To Help You Include Your Mom In Your Wedding

I’m is going to give you ideas so you can include your mom in your wedding. These ideas are mostly geared towards planning your wedding, with some that are meant for your actual wedding day. Remember, not every idea will work for every mom. See what will work for you, and then talk to your mom about what appeals to her. It’s a back-and-forth discussion, rather than telling each other what you want. It’s your wedding, your way, and you’ll want to go about including your mom in a tactful and respectful way.

Let’s get into it!

INCLUDE HER WITH YOUR WEDDING PLANNING

First things first. Including your mom in your wedding by letting her enjoy wedding planning with you.

What does this mean exactly? Well, for starters, have your mom join any fun wedding planning milestones. These include tastings, picking out outfits, and joining in on engagement parties and bridal showers. Beyond that, simply talk to your mom about your wedding. What are you currently working on? What’s next? Are there any vendors you can’t decide on? Just talking about the wedding will make your mom feel included, and she may even be able to give some good advice.

HAVE YOUR MOM MAKE SOME WEDDING RELATED DECISIONS

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. Allowing someone else to make decisions does not mean that you give up control.

Here’s how you do it. If you are unsure of a direction, narrow down your choices. Make any choice a good one, in your eyes. And then ask someone else to choose from those choices. If you want to include your mom in your wedding, delegate some of these “final choices” to her. No matter the direction she goes, you’ll be okay with it. She will be involved, too. Just be sure to give deadlines on the decisions because there’s nothing worse than waiting on someone else to decide something that you, yourself, struggled with.

GO DRESS SHOPPING WITH YOUR MOM (FOR HER DRESS)

Dress shopping isn’t just for the brides and bridesmaids. It’s also for the moms, too.

This is a simple way to include your mom in your wedding, without actually impacting wedding planning. Go dress shopping with her. You can even do this online, virtually, where you both look at options and talk about them on the phone before ordering them. It’s even more fun to do in person, popping into shops to try stuff on and ultimately pick out an outfit. Make a day of it, following the shopping with lunch or pedicures.

GET PAMPERED BEFORE YOUR WEDDING (AND BRING YOUR MOM)

Sometimes including your mom just means bringing her along to things you’re doing in preparation for your wedding.

So, ask her if she wants to join for the fun stuff.

Most moms would love to join if you’re going to get pampered ahead of your wedding. I’m talking about if you’re getting a manicure, pedicure, or maybe a massage. It’s a bonding experience for two women to go to these things together, and it’s enjoyable. No pressure, just relaxation and fun.

SPEND THE MORNING OF YOUR WEDDING WITH YOUR MOM

I’ve given lots of morning of the wedding tips before. You can find them in this post.

One easy way to include your mom in your wedding is to invite her to join with all the morning of the wedding preparations. Maybe she’s just hanging out. Maybe she gets a task, like picking up breakfast. Or, perhaps she’s getting dolled up with the girls. Long story short, she’s there. She’s included, and the two of you will have ample time to chat and get ready for the event later on.

ASK YOUR MOM TO WALK YOU DOWN THE AISLE

When it comes to walking down the aisle, dads usually get all the glory.

But what about if your mom needs a moment? Perhaps your dad is unable to be at your wedding. Or, you just want your mom to shine here. There is no rule saying that your mom (or anyone else for that matter) cannot walk you down the aisle. In fact, some cultures always have moms there. It’s an honorable position, one that some moms deserve.

MENTION OR THANK YOUR MOM IN YOUR VOWS

Has your mom played a role in your life that is unmistakable? Give her a shout out in your vows.

This does not have to be sappy. It can be very sweet, overtly or subtly. Simply have some space in your vows to mention family, friends, or anyone who guided you or your partner to this point. You can go into details, or not. The point is that you mention or thank your mom specifically while saying your vows. She will appreciate it, and it will be an easy way to include her.

ASK YOUR MOM TO LEAD A UNITY CEREMONY

Do you know what a unity ceremony is? If not, this post lays out lots of options.

The thing about a unity ceremony is that it’s usually guided within your actual wedding ceremony. Whether it’s lighting a candle, washing someone’s feet, tying your hands together, it does need participation from others to make it happen. If your mom is willing, ask her to help set up the unity ceremony for you, and walk you through it. This does not have to be difficult. It can be simple instructions like “light candle, light other candle with that candle”. If your mom is up for the task, it’s a special way to include her.

HAVE CHILDHOOD PHOTOS, INCLUDING THOSE WITH YOUR MOM, AT YOUR RECEPTION

This is such a sweet way to include your mom in your wedding, with almost no stress or work on your end.

Childhood photos are a great way to provide décor, some context, a bit of history, and even some entertainment for your wedding guests. Putting photos around of a younger you, with your mom, can be a wonderful way to include your mom without drawing a ton of attention to her.

ASK YOUR MOM TO GIVE A SPEECH OR READING AT YOUR WEDDING

For whatever reason, usually dads get the glory when it comes to speeches or readings. If she’s up for it, why not ask you mom to do one?

This does not have to be daunting. If it’s a speech, it can be short and sweet. If it’s a reading, she can literally read it off a page. You’ll be able to include her, give her something to focus on, and also have a wonderful moment at your wedding where your mom is featured. For some situations, it’s a win-win.

DO A SPECIAL DANCE WITH YOUR MOM

Did you know that I danced with my mom at my wedding? My dad had passed away by the time I got married, so dancing with my mom just made sense.

Even if you have your dad there, and you choose to do the traditional father-daughter dance, you can still have a dance with your mom. Why not? It’s your wedding. Pick the song, talk to your mom about it, and dance away. Feel free to call attention to it, or not.

NAME A SIGNATURE DRINK AFTER YOUR MOM

Oh, I love this way to include moms in weddings. Signature drinks.

This drink does not have to be alcoholic. It should be something that your mom likes to drink, though. Or a version of something she likes. Simply create the recipe, give it a catchy name (after your mom, of course!), and then promote it at your wedding with a sign.

Need some tips on signature drinks? Check out this post. And for fall wedding signature drink recipes, this is a good post for you.

THOUGHTS ON WAYS TO INCLUDE YOUR MOM IN YOUR WEDDING

Friends, there are so many ways to include your mom in your wedding. Some ways are overt. Some are very subtle. Pick and choose the ways that work best for you, and your mom. If needed, give her a project or focus. Or, ask her to participate in very low-maintenance ways. You’ve got this! Happy wedding planning!

More From Hummingbird Wedding Advice On Parents and Weddings

How To Ask Your Partner’s Parents For Their Blessing To Get Married

Coordinating With Parents Of Kids Who Are In Your Wedding

11 Ways To Include Your Future Mother-In-Law In Your Wedding

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