Five Things That Went Wrong On My Wedding Day

This is a somewhat painful post for me to write because it’s all about what went wrong on my wedding day.

I spent a whole year meticulously planning my wedding. There were hours spent researching, tracking, consulting, and really thinking about all the details. I hired a venue that was known for their impeccable service and experience. Our photographer was named one of the best in the whole Bay Area.  I had a fantastic support system of people trying to help me execute my detailed vision. I was so confident that nothing would have went wrong on my wedding day. 

But still. . . things didn’t go entirely to plan.

I’m sharing this with you guys because when you plan a wedding, you may be doing some risk mitigation to make sure everything goes perfect. You may wonder what may happen and what you can do about it ahead of time. And that’s a very important part of project management when you think about it.

So, in an effort to help you, I’ll share my own mishaps in an effort to help you prevent these things from happening at your wedding. . .

1. MICROPHONE ISSUES

I really thought we had this one covered. My husband is a music vendor and a musician. But still, the microphones that were to be used during our speeches didn’t work that well. My husband claimed it may have been due to the cell phone interference in the room, but who knows? All I remember is that my father in law had to shout to be heard and my maid of honor had to give her speech from an unusual location in the room. Not ideal.

Lesson: Check the microphone set up well ahead of time.

2. MY HUSBAND MESSED UP HIS VOWS (TWICE)

I go into it in another post, but I pretty much wrote our vows and planned our ceremony. I did a lot of research on the flow, chose quotes and words that I liked, and gave everything to our friend who officiated. For the personal part, I laid out a framework of what we could say to each other, with memories and promises, and then finished it all off with vows.

Weeks before the wedding, I shared our vows in a document with my fiancé. I guess there was some confusion about them and he only said the first two promises (out of six). So. . . during the ceremony it was a bit surprising for me but we had to roll with it.

Also, when our officiant got to the part where she goes “for richer, poorer, etc”, he blurted out “I Do” way ahead of time. This was actually hilarious because she kept going and everyone had a good laugh while my husband blushed.

Lesson: Actually review the plan step by step with your fiancé.

3. LATE NIGHT TRANSPORTATION

We hired a shuttle to take guests to and from the hotel to our venue, and after the shuttle picked up guests at 10pm, they were supposed to come back and forth until everyone was picked up.

They never did, though!

A group of us who stayed late to pack up (my bridal party and closest family), ended up totally stranded. We waited and waited, and tried to call uber, but we were a little out there and everything took a long time. Not only was it late, it was cold. . . so it wasn’t ideal at all.

Eventually a guest of ours offered to drive some of us back to the hotel, and I believe an uber or shuttle did come back for everyone else. Let’s just say by the time I got to the hotel I was EXHAUSTED.

Lesson: Have an immediate travel back up plan for your plan, in case things fall through.

4. GUEST SEATING

There was a bit of confusion leading up to the seating of guests at our ceremony. I had asked some of our guys to show folks to their seats, and also requested that the venue leave the first two rows open for family.

Well, some of our out of town family got stuck in the very last row and couldn’t see anything when the intention was that they sit in the first few rows. As a result, no one sat in those rows. I think this was one of those things I should have double-checked, or just informed them myself instead of relying on others to pass the message along.

Lesson: If you have an intended seat for a guest, tell them ahead of time instead of relying on others to pass the message.

5. THE WEATHER

This one actually worked out.

In early November, in Livermore, California, it’s often very nice out. Like 80* and sunny. Well, a week before my wedding it was 90*, so I thought we were good.  However, my wedding day had a high of 54* and was rainy. This meant that our outdoor ceremony and cocktail hour needed to be moved indoors at the last minute.

The result was so beautiful. We got permission to get married in a wine room, surrounded by old barrels. It was cool, dark, candlelit. Guests told me afterwards that it felt incredibly intimate. Looking back, I wouldn’t have had it any other way.

Lesson: Have a bad weather back up plan, and go with the flow. 

My main advice to to expect that not everything will go to plan.  You can analyze your risks, and implement mitigation plans, but things will not be perfect. If at all possible, learn from what went wrong on my wedding day to help prevent similar issues on yours.  

The best you can do is smile and enjoy what’s going well, in the moment, and let go of what didn’t go well afterwards.  Celebrate what went according to your vision, and be happy for the experience you did end up having. 

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